I awoke to find myself on a very soft combination of moss and grass. The gentle breeze reminded me that there was an opening in the back of my hospital gown. I blinked twice to make my eyes work again and glanced about at my surroundings. I was on top of a small hill with a few trees here and there. The sun was heading down but I could just make out some red and yellow leaves scattered around on the ground. I took a moment to enjoy the smell and feel of the crisp air. I am a big fan of autumn.

    I had several more reality jumps to go before I got to the Labyrinth and I would definitely need to find some more appropriate clothing to wear. I got to my feet and took a better look around. I was in a small park and in the dim light I could just make out a dirt path a few dozen feet in front of me. It was almost impossible to make out the road at the end of the park but I was pretty sure that the headlights I saw belonged to cars in the style of the 50’s. If memory served, this realm should be very similar to the Earth I just left; however, it will be running about five decades or so behind. The bad news was that my Vette wouldn’t even be built for another thirty years or so. The good news was that the men of this era had style. As soon as I acquired some money I was going to get a snazzy suit.

    I started down the hill, careful to step over the few glass fragments that had come with me through the reality wall. I headed over to take cover among the trees, leaning against one for support, as I slowly lowered myself to the ground.  My head was throbbing and I ran my hand over the back of it to check the stitches. They seemed to be no worse for wear after my little fall. I did notice that I was definitely missing a huge hunk of my hair where it was shaved for putting in the stitches. I was never a big fan of my boring brown locks anyway.

    I had just gotten comfortable and let my head fall forward when I heard a whimper in the distance. I was planning on resting here until full nightfall but as usual the hero in me was going to get involved in something that was none of my business. From where I stood I could see the path curve down through a thick grove of trees. The branches came together completely overhead making a dark tunnel. Seemed like a great place for an ambush. It sounded like the local gang of hoodlums had thought the same. I was really in no shape to run off saving someone but I was a nice guy and now I would pay for it.

    I made my way down the path as quietly as I could and found a large tree to stand behind that afforded me a much better view. From this distance I was able to hear the man begging for his life and several punks laughing. I stretched my left arm out trying to see how high I could lift it without pain. It was sore and I didn’t want to reopen the wound so I guess I would have to take them single-handed. It only sounded like a few of them anyway.

    I got to the edge of the natural tunnel and looked in to see four thugs maybe twenty years of age standing over the body of the aforementioned whimperer. They must have gotten tired of his whining and hit him. He wasn’t moving and I hoped he was just unconscious. They were going through his wallet and coat. There were four of them however and I had but one arm so I decided to play it fair. I stepped into the alcove and demanded their surrender. 

    At first they were startled by my intrusion into their little party, but quickly they recovered and all laughed out loud. I always did have trouble with that intimidation thing, something to do with my five foot ten frame I would imagine. The tall one in the back appeared to be their leader and instructed his fellow associates to deal with me. As they came forward I realized that this was in fact the first time I had ever fought someone while I was wearing a hospital gown. Damn that breeze.

    The first guy came at me with a small knife. I stepped to the side and grabbed his wrist twisting it enough to cause immense pain and make him drop the blade. I then grabbed his shirt and with a little strength threw him back into the punk behind him. They both collapsed to the ground giving me time to deal with the third. This punk swung a wide left hook which I stepped under and caught him in the kidney with my elbow. I then kicked out his legs and sent him to the ground with his friends. Just as I was attempting to show them the camaraderie of being on the ground together the first two had regained their footing. The first punk was gripping his wrist where I had twisted it and wincing as if in great pain.  His brother in arms was ready to come at me again.

    I normally enjoy a good brawl but these guys had no training to speak of and I was still slightly hazy so I decided to finish it. The second guy came running at me swinging his right arm like a club. I simply continued his momentum and turned his arm flipping him over and sending him careening into a tree. He smacked into the trunk and fell unconscious. The third guy who I had just put on the ground got up to one knee before my swift kick to his chest took the fight out of him. The first goon still holding his wrist hesitated for a moment and clearly thought about running when the large man spoke up.

    “Take him now or you fight me” he stated unemotionally.

    The guy ran at me swinging wildly. I blocked two blows before backhanding him with a bit of force and sending him to the ground a dozen feet away. I was hoping the display of strength would have dissuaded the last guy but I didn’t seem to have any such luck. He just smiled as he took off his dirty hat and coat laid them on a large log.  He wore a white tank top under red suspenders holding up his brown corduroys. He leaned his head from one shoulder to another stretching out his neck. He then took a boxers’ stance and added a bounce to his step. He came at me slowly; carefully measuring my reactions. This guy moved as if he had trained for a long time. He was clearly about to show me why he was the leader.

    He came at me with two quick jabs, one from each arm. He was much faster than he looked and I barely stepped out of reach of the second. He bounced back at me twice feinting both times before the third time when he came again with the jabs. I stepped out of the way of the first two but the third caught me in the chin. This brought forth the friendly reminder that getting hit in the face when you have a head wound sucks. I felt a little woozy and wasn’t sure I could afford to take another one of those. He was pretty fast for a mortal and I had to take him down quick. That was when fortune smiled at me and allowed his ego to throw the next punch. He swung with a fast right hook as I ducked under putting myself in the perfect spot to introduce my elbow to his face. He stumbled two steps and spun around to come back at me. I was not about to let up and as soon as he turned I caught him in the face with my right fist. I heard something crack and feared I broke his jaw. He hit the ground and tried to get up but just then his body reminded him it was naptime. I didn’t intend to hit him so hard but I was far from the top of my game and couldn’t afford to slack off. I decided to humiliate him just a bit more by leaving him in his socks and underwear as I acquired his pants and shoes.

    Two of the three little punks rose to their feet and thought about defending their boss. They must have been smarter than they looked because they took off running. I took the coat off of the log and tried it on. It was a little dirty and a few sizes too big for me but it would be better than the gown. I picked up the knife off of the ground and put it in my pocket. I grabbed the wallet and walked over to check on the poor business man who shouldn’t be in the park after dark. When I headed over to wake him I caught his eyes already watching me and as soon as I started towards him he began to panic. I put my hands up in a calming gesture as I handed him back his wallet.

    “You should be all right now, I took care of your friends” I said motioning to the two bodies.

    “Are they dead?” he asked.

    He had a slight accent that I didn’t recognize; some kind of diluted Italian would have been my guess. “No, they will live” I responded.

    “Thank you for saving me, how can I repay you?”

    “It’s no big deal I was just passing by and was happy to help. If you could just point me in the direction of the nearest diner we will call it even.”

    “Nearest diner? I will hear nothing of that. You must let me invite you to my house for a meal; my wife is an exquisite cook. Please, please come have dinner with us,” he begged.

     “Your offer is kind but I hardly think I am dressed for dinner besides I have a great distance yet to go.” I told him.

    “Sir, you must allow me to repay you, ‘tis a matter of honor. The Smithes are indebted to no man. It is the least I could do. I am a tailor and you will have a suit and meal, I will hear no more of it. My car is this way if you please,” he said with the politest insistence I have ever heard.

    “Well Mr. Smithe you’re in luck, I am in the market for a new suit.”

    Then we were off down the path. He rambled on the whole time about how his family had come over when he was four to start their own business and live the American dream. That had been forty years ago and now he had taken his father’s business and turned it into one of the most reputable tailor shops in the area. He was very proud of his suits and made it clear that I was in for a real treat as we arrived at his car. It was a large black car with silver trim sort of like a ‘57’ Chevy Belair except it had four headlights side by side and much larger tail fins. It started with a roar and off we went. He wasn’t very good at driving a stick.

    I must have dozed off and he woke me when we reached his home. It was a dark green Victorian-style cottage with maroon shutters and trimmings. I was exhausted but what I remember of dinner was this. A great deal of duck or chicken was consumed along with a terrific tomato soup, fresh bread and iced tea. There was some discussion of me being in no shape to leave, which ended with me awakening the next morning in their guest room.